Lookin' for somethin' I said?

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

To all the Real Men out there...


Dear Men,

Please let me start by saying that I miss you. I miss the strength. I miss the security. I even miss the way you pretend that you are an expert on everything. What happened to you? Was it the feminist movement? Did those women steal your esteem for themselves? I don’t like them. I never have liked them. I know who you really are. I appreciate what you bring to the table and I applaud your virtues. Please understand that I am not alone. Real women want to feel safe in your arms. Real women need you. Real women are proud of your achievements and stand tall on your arm. We never belittle you in public or in private. We listen to you. We may disagree with you but we respect your opinions and we hold your values.

For thousands of years you have been our caretakers. You have protected us and given us the most special gift of all - The seed to grow our families. We owe our lives and our freedoms to you. You have gone to war and given your lives to protect us from our enemies. You have carried our hearts in your hands, comforted our tears and quieted our fears.

There are fewer and fewer real men out there. I see men nowadays so conflicted as to who they should be. They are raised in this society where women have lost their place and attempt to supersede men as the dominant sex. I am regularly appalled by the behavior of my sex and disgusted with your treatment by other women of my generation. The crimes against your manhood are too many and too severe.

I for one will not sit by any longer and allow for the decimation of moral character and natural ability. I refuse to allow you, Real Men, to be victims of one movement’s hate. That’s what this is. It’s a hate crime. I see it all so clearly right now. Feminism is a hate crime against men.

I know that there are still real men out there. I know that there are good and decent men that have been made to be the victim of emotional and sometimes physical abuse at the hands of the women in their lives. Why is that? Why is it that so many of you suffer so? I have a theory for you. I believe that you are the victim of fatherless women. So many women in my generation haven’t had a good strong man in our lives to show us what to expect. We don’t know what to do or how to handle being treated well. We have been taught by society that if you open a door for us it means that you believe us to be too weak to pull it open ourselves. We are taught to be suspicious of your kindness. We haven’t had fathers that give us respect to show us what respect really is. The previous generation has misled us.

Don’t give up on us women yet. There are others like me that see you for what you really are. There are those of us that need you. We not only need you but we want you. We want you to be men and we want you to hold your head high and walk with your back straight. We want to raise your children to respect you. We want our friends and families to admire you and appreciate the happiness that you give us. We want you to be the foundations that we know you can be. We want our men back.

Thank you for listening to me. I appreciate your time and the care you take with me. I promise that I will never let you down.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Excuse me, Mr. Hipster. I believe you left this in your seat...

While staying in the Pearl District this last week and a half I have begun to develop a concern regarding litter and what I believe to be the disease that it is a symptom of.

First, the people that I am going to talk about are not degenerate vagrants. I want to make this VERY clear. These are individuals that obviously have jobs or some sort of income to support themselves.

Second, for those of you not in or from the Portland area let me explain what the Pearl is. It is an area of downtown Portland where all the hip and happening folks that don't struggle financially live. Very bohemian. Thirty-something men in long scarfs, skinny jeans and black horn rimmed glasses carrying messenger bags and forty-something women in ruffle skirts, tights and Chuck Taylors walking Scottish Terriers while sipping thier botique style coffee (not p.c to drink Starbucks - corporate greed and all that) and listening to Ani Defranco on thier iPods kind of folks.

Now, I REALLY like the Pearl District. The independently owned shops and art galleries are beautiful. The local restaraunts and breweries (yes, even though I no longer drink I still appreciate the Brew Pub and Public House atmosphere and LOVE to see people succeed by doing something that they LOVE to do and are good at) add a certain aura of uniqueness to the neighborhood that can be both comfortable and classy. I like the fact that you can walk into a gallery in jeans and a tee shirt or in heels and a blouse and are generally treated as a customer.

What I don't care for is the sense of entitlement that comes with this area. What seems to me to be the "I don't have to clean up after my children that throw candy wrappers on the ground. There are city workers for that." attitude. The other day as I was walking past Powell's Books, a woman (the one mentioned above) had an empty soda cup from what looked like Rocco's Pizza and she PLACED IT ONTOP of the garbage can and walked away. The opening was less than 3 inches from where she placed her garbage. I stopped, having something in my hand that I HAD CARRIED FOR THREE BLOCKS WAITING FOR A THIS CAN TO APPEAR WITHIN REACH, and said loudly "REALLY? You couldn't just drop that in the garbage? Asshole." I don't know if she heard me. I hope she did.

The same thing happened on the MAX ( http://trimet.org/max/index.htm ) this morning. Some hipster dude (again, the one mentioned above) got up from his seat and left an empty juice bottle and a muffin wrapper on his seat. A young mother with two kids started cleaning it up so that her children could sit down. Now, while she is a mother, she isn't HIS mother. There is NO excuse for this kind of selfish elitist behavior. So...As a proponent of "practice what you preach" I said to the man "Excuse me, Mr. Hipster. I believe you left this in your seat" and pointed to the garbage that the young mother had in her hand. His response? "Oh, yeah. I figured the driver would get it. Sorry 'bout that" The young mother said "Well, here. I don't want my kids playing with it."

Now, was all that necessary? All he had to do was pick up his trash and walk it to the trash bin at the MAX stop. There didn't have to be this issue. But there was. He felt that there was no need for him to clean his mess. Why? Because he's in public? Does he believe that there being people that are "paid for that" is an open door to abhorrent behavior?

What if it had been me that left the mess? Would he have corrected me and then complained on FB like I am over him? No. He wouldn't. I'd bet you dollars to doughnuts that he would have glanced at my mess, sneered under his breath about my litter AND STILL have left it for the driver to clean up.

AND THAT ladies and gentlemen is what I see as a fundamental flaw in our society. I can't say that this is the younger generation because these two individuals that I am mentioning are my age or more. This is a societal problem. The belief that someone else will clean our mess for us. That it's not our jobs to be responsible for our own actions and that it's ok to blame others or place action in someone else's hands. The fact is that it's not ok to sit on our hands and wait for the strong to support the weak. It's not ok for people of character to consistently come to the rescue of those indecisive individuals that even when knowing right from wrong STILL have difficulty forming anything concrete in thier lives. AS people of character we are having our energies drained by this type of "leave it for the next guy" way of thinking. Guess what? WE ARE the next guy. OUR CHILDREN are the next guy. When we allow this kind of behavior to go unchecked this is the result. Cleaning up the messes of those that think society "owes" them. Individuals that feed off the perspiration of those of us that believe in an honest days pay for an honest days work.

What can we do to change this? Work. Educate yourselves. Say something. Get involved. Become well rounded in your politcal and moral beliefs. Stop listening to the emotional and focus on the rational. Vote in candidates that you can stand behind on more than one issue. Take a course in Sociology, Economics, Business or History. Just don't sit around and believe that it's someone else's job. If we are to regain the strength of solidarity that we once held as a Nation we HAVE to begin here at home. Outside forces can't hold us together. Strength comes from within.